Half​-​Degree

by Jake Bardin

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1.
Half-Degree 02:20
Bookworm in the street: Find something to read There must be something to read. Bookworm living free, She's changing her hair And changing me Bookworm wants to leave Find half of a job With a half a degree Quiet and complete A stone in the stream A bug on a leaf So hold on to those plans You've got the world between your hands Teach them to read again Bookworm's going home Free food and a bed Where the noises are slow College locked her dreams Inside of her head Just out of her reach "Get out of my head," I hope she says in her sleep I hope she fights with the bed I hope she tears through the sheets, until she's out of her head "Get out of my head," I said in my sleep "Get out of my head," I'm getting out of my lease "Get out of my head," And I just want to get free So hop off I-35, get on the exit with me And we'll drive out of our heads
2.
Speak 02:09
Coming home to rain inside Reflection is trying to warn me Look away, that loving gaze, its horns were trying to gore me Like you know they do You've sacrificed some time to see me bleeding through Let's hear some words from you. Don't think just speak. Coming home, there's change outside, I fell asleep before you Face the way my eyes behave I see just what I want to. And, yeah, you know I do. You know I'd sacrifice my pride to see the good in you. But you don't have to move No, please don't leave, just speak. The drag from Zeus to Jupiter is drawing out the truth in her: She stopped to watch the magic in the stars. Coming home and every time the door just locks behind me. Walking home my steps align with everyone beside me, But coming home I only talk to people who remind me Of your color shown in speech.
3.
I sure like to talk about this empty feeling. Songs about it calm me down before I leave. One day we will figure out some magic potion, Kills the doubt and calms us down. And we'll finally smile showing teeth, And they'll tell some story that we'll finally believe. Everybody knows your face, you whistle by on roller skates. They'd stoop so low if you asked. One day they will talk it through, "How'd all the sunshine fall on you, and where'd it go? Where's room for me?" And they'll finally smile showing teeth, And they'll hear some story that they'll finally believe. Dark around the trail, ended on your tail. Following around anyone we found. I was lost, and you were too. Balanced in the grass, waving people pass. Your patience ran too thin, I was saving in So much breath to breathe into you. Here I am. Where are you?
4.
Fifteen alarms, I'm covered in sleep Don't be alarmed, the city's in sheets Swore off yourself when I packed up and left from your street But I've never felt so clenched in your teeth Come in the basement, Few dozen sets of eyes You just want your saving soul to fill a hole in mine You just want your saving soul to shine Fifteen alarms. Fifteen different tones. I need something more. I'll sleep through my phone I don't want to be just a kid who can't wake up alone, no.
5.
It's about time I told you about this hole inside my head I fill with pictures. It's about time I told you how quickly I'm unwinding and how bad it hurts. I did for you what I thought I'd never do: cleaned my whole car, And I changed t-shirts Because you were one and I promised I'd make two, Could not have put that any worse But you and all your friends have got a reason For acting like you do. I can't hold it against you, Because you're something that I'm not. You're something that I'll never be. Oh, you're so far ahead of me. Look at you. Good for you. I wish I hadn't come all this way for you. My head's down and I'm walking through all these people talking About the things I'll never understand, I'll never want to And the fingers in my pocket will never touch your hand, No matter how bad they want to And I don't get this reassuring feeling people tell me about it must be me So maybe you can point the way you've seen more Than I'll ever hope to see But you and all your friends have found your freedom That's more than I can say, it's okay I didn't care that much about you anyway "We're all the same," you're right, you're so smart You know where to put the blame But I'd rather be like anyone than you You and all your friends should get to leaving I'm sure you'll be just fine, you do it all the time All the tally marks on the walls of your mind? "How do you feel?" I ask, and you say "It feels so good to be real, and someone else, is staring at that very same moon," Oh, you're so smart, aren't you? And you and all your friends should stop repeating yourselves, "Whatcha wanna do?" And you feel around, Looking for somebody kinda new. Well, I'll tell you right now: I'm not too keen on this bush that you're beating around, So just leave me alone.
6.
Good Advice 02:56
Clasp your hands, don't touch me, you'll just freeze. I'm not what you want, I'm what you see. I am not your train, watch me leave, Because I give good advice regarding me. And I am not alone, I'm in-between I lay down in my thoughts to watch what I've already seen But everything I play is on repeat So maybe someone else will crack the screen. You were there, I saw your face, Your open smile, with time to waste. I can't quite make it home if I'm not alone. Cross your arms, don't touch me, you'll get sick. All my depth was drowned when the surface got so thick. I'll stand and talk to you until I get sore, As my mind bends, and dips around yours. I love to go too far, I love to live my doubts. Come on, sink my boat, and let me shout it out. I will pick myself up when I am An older, wiser, stronger bearded man. You were there, I saw your face, I'll stay a while, but these days I just can't quite make it home If I'm not alone.
7.
Dog Person 02:36
Thought I saw you in the corner Didn't make it home till two So sit me down and tell me What else is there to do? I floated on the surface I never see them cry But, to feel down is to feel worthless So, I know: no more blonde hairs in my eyes. No more whining by the window. No more hoping you'll survive, Cause you stop fearing something dying From the very moment that you know it died No more fur-ball who will tell me That I'm not so bad a guy I'll hang my head until I fall forward So that I can find some motion in my life
8.
Hide 03:31
Hear me out I've put more thought into these words Than you are sad about the sound of them, And let me down My hopes have floated in the air But I know you're watching from the ground Because you're making money from the crowd But if you ask me, it should be the other way around But we can hide from all of this We could bury ourselves, ignorance is something else. Don't you think? Let me go Your fingers wrapped around my ankle, pulling backwards Pulling from the flow Of everything that is true, and pulling towards Everything that I believed And, you're too good for tearing at the seams Because drastic wordplay has never found you in your dreams anyway But we can hide from all of this We could bury ourselves, ignorance is something else. Don't you think? I never thought that I'd be so ashamed of myself Mad at myself Scared of myself Hiding in myself all the same And I never thought that you'd so impressed by myself Changed your mind? Well, I'll be hiding inside If you're looking for somebody to blame
9.
Why'd you run and take my hand? I'm just the same as everyone else. High fives and bus rides, I'm trying to prove how good I've never felt And trying not to breathe all of the dust that I collected on the shelf We'll watch TV together, keep talking in circles And re-creating scenes we've seen on commercials And maybe if it seems like we're smiling and having good times We'll walk around the edge of our circle of doubt And we'll mention names of people who we most hate to talk about Cause maybe if your broken heart can taste revenge, it'll taste like glue And every time I run this route I'm burned But you seem pleased with me, so who can get hurt? Break the fence, and clear the stands You're something else, but yeah, you know that Trust me: you can trust me I'm just wasting words, but that's where I'm at Still, I'm trying not to breathe until I know that you believe me for a fact We'll watch TV together, start mocking their voices, And making one another feel secure in the choices we make Pretending we're the same We'll walk around the edge of the lake There's a drought, but that's something we agreed we're both Just not gonna talk about Maybe all the clouds are hiding softer feet to pad on the shore Every time I run this route I'm burned But you seem pleased to see All the heat that comes with hard work And I think you are pleased to see me too

about

These songs were recorded over the last three years.


Huge thanks to those who helped me in making this...

Production Credits: Michael Moffitt (All Your Friends, You Seem Pleased, Hide), and Brian Gornik (Half-Degree)

Musician Credits: Michael Moffitt, Brian Gornik, Natalie Patton

Album Art: Jimmy Egeland

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released June 28, 2017

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Jake Bardin Austin, Texas

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